The prompt this month was a photo prompt about the chapter of life we’re currently in. What were we celebrating, what were we struggling with, what does life look like right now?
I downloaded the letterglow app and made use of Ali’s digital stamps for the first time. It was super easy to use and I’m super excited about the prospect of using more digital products in the future.
The most important part of this process for me though was the importance of recognising struggles .
I had a couple of really rough days at the beginning of the month. We had just come back from a wonderful (but freezing) trip to Wellington, and despite having a great weekend away I was entirely miserable. I was snappy with my boyfriend, I couldn’t find the motivation to do any chores, I didn’t want to go to work or really do anything other than sleep and cry. I was struggling. I knew my mood and emotions were down to my hormones but that didn’t stop me from absolutely loathing myself for the way I was feeling.
After watching Ali’s video for the month I reflected on the way I had been feeling. Accepting that it’s okay to be unhappy is a really important lesson for me. Generally speaking I’m a pretty upbeat person. If I were to imagine that my brain was an Inside Out style control centre, Joy would be in the head seat. While that certainly doesn’t mean that I’m positive all the time, I’m not used to feeling so intensely gloomy.
From listening to Ali I realised that my biggest struggle at that moment was with accepting that I was feeling unhappy rather than actually being unhappy. The low I was feeling was immensely compounded by the fact that I wasn’t just letting myself be sad or glum. I was fighting those feelings and becoming angry with myself for not being able to escape them. Instead of pushing them down I needed to give myself grace and accept that that was the space I was in and that was okay.